Customer just lectured me about going back to school so I could "start my career". I did not react positively.
Awesome! I have a customer that drives by every morning and then drives away when he sees I'm working. I think that means I win.
Yes, coffee is expensive. But you're more than welcome to go to Ethiopia and get it yourself.
"How big is an 8 oz cup?" -- and then my brain started leaking out of my ear.
"I've literally been waiting 20 minutes for my drink." -- No, you haven't. And you apparently don't understand how time or language works.
You really start to question your life choices when every shower you take smells like you're brewing coffee.
When the homie comes in for coffee 3 minutes before you close and you're like nah it's cool but really you're not friends anymore.
Quad-latte 4 minutes before I close? Go f*ck yourself, homie.
I asked him what size he wanted, and he replied that he wasn't in the mood to answer questions. There's no joke here, that just happened.
I'm smiling, aren't I? I think that's enough of a Halloween costume.
I asked her why she needed a drink carrier if she only had one drink. "Because I have to carry it someplace."
If you use a french accent to order a croissant, I'm going to insist that you finish out the rest of the order that way.
I'm not gonna count the number of ice cubes in your drink, so it would appear we've arrived at a stalemate.
My ex-boss thinks the website is gonna stop because I don't work there anymore. Man, I didn't even work there when I worked there!
I think it was when she gave me her order over the bathroom stall I was currently occupying, that I decided she was a jerk.
We're both on the same team... You want your coffee quickly, and I want you to leave as soon as possible.
"I'm sorry to be picky but..." -- Lemme just stop you right there. No, you are not.
There's nowhere to sit?! Well, I can kick someone out, whittle you a new chair, or you can grow the f*ck up. Whichever.
The worst part about my boss not having the courage to fire me himself: I didn't get to yell, "No, YOU'RE fired!"
But WHY should I smile more?